


I look up from my phone at a dark-skinned man with a medium curly top drop fade haircut and short trimmed beard and glasses on his face. I recognize him as Jaredβs best man, the man who escorted me down the aisle. He could be maybe near my age, but heβs still got some of that awkward youthful charm and baby fat. So itβs hard to tell. Lord knows people always act shocked when Iβve told them Iβm twenty-nine because they think Iβm younger. Technically, Iβm thirty now, but I havenβt had a chance to tell that to anyone yet.
βYeah?β I ask
βMind if I sit here?β
βOh. Uh. Yeah,β I finally say starting to grab my purse off the table. I actually do mind. There are a bunch of other empty and abandoned tables he could have gone to, but he came back here to mine.
βItβs fine,β he says and sits a couple of seats away from me. He plops what looks like a sketch pad on the table, bends his head so close to the pad that heβll definitely have a crook in his neck later, and begins to draw.
Normally, when someone gets near my space like this and minds their own business, I go back to my own little headspace. But thereβs something about this man that gives me a sense of Deja-vu.
βHey,β I say before I can stop myself causing him to turn his head in my direction even though heβs still hunched over his pad.
He looks behind him first and then looks at me again and points to himself.
I nod and then ask, βHave we met? Like before this whole wedding thing.β
He squints his eyes at me. βI donβt think so.β
βHm.β
βUmβ¦β He looks at his sketch pad and then back at me.
I know that look. Itβs that look that says he really didnβt come back here to be bothered. Now seeing him with his sketch pad, Iβm guessing he chose to sit back here with me because itβs the table furthest away from the excitement at the front near the dance floor even though the music fills the whole venue.
I understand his sentiment. Iβm back here because people have exhausted me, and I want to be by myself and not talk to anyone butβ¦ Thereβs something familiar about this guy. Maybe he reminds me of a celebrity or something. But I canβt figure it out if I donβt get him talking. His fault for invading my space.
βTrying to get away from the insanity?β I ask, having to raise my voice as those near the front who werenβt already on the dance floor rush to the dance floor as the βCupid Shuffleβ comes on.
βYeah,β he says not impolite but in a curt manner which tells me that it wasnβt to talk to me.
βWhat are you drawing?β
βOh.β He looks back at his pad again and then shakes his head and says to me, βNothing.β
βYou could have just told me you donβt want to show it to me.β
His eyes widen and he shakes his head quickly as he says, βI didnβt mean it like that. I justβ¦ You wouldnβt be interested anyway.β
Definitely younger than me. Something about his tone. Itβs not childish but he sounds like I did when I was twenty-three or so and hadnβt figured out that I was actually a whole adult yet.
βItβs okay,β I assure. βI get it. When youβre creating itβs likeβ¦ Itβs like your baby. Fragile and developing. The scrutiny of the world would kill it before it got a chance to shine.β
βYeah. Yeah, thatβs it,β he says looking surprised and decidedly more interested in talking as he sits up. βYouβre an artist.β
βIsh.β
βIsh?β he asks raising an eyebrow and all of a sudden the awkwardness is gone and suddenly Iβm not so sure about his age anymore. Now he seems older. It doesnβt help that his voice is a deep smooth baritone that I’m pretty sure has practically melted the panties off women in the past. And now that I look closer at him, he has a certain stockiness to him that’s not the result of working out. Itβs closer to a man who has finally filled out the body puberty gave him. Maybe not so young after all.
βI code and program stuff,β I say. βItβs not the same butβ¦β
βItβs still an act of creating,β he says and then looks at the chair that separates us. βCan I?β
βYeah.β
He slides over into the chair and slides his pad between us so that I can see what heβs drawing. Itβs the vague outline of a body but there are no recognizable features. Nothing that distinguishes it from anything else.
βWhat is it?β I ask.
He shrugs as he starts to draw again. βI donβt know. I never know until the end.β
βHow is that?β
βBecause a lot of times I just draw what I feel and whatever shapes I want, and I have to wait for the big picture.β
βYou must have something in mind. You canβt draw it if you donβt. I canβt design something from code if I have no idea what itβs going to look like.β
βA human being,β he replies cheekily.
I scoff and roll my eyes.
βSo coding? What kind of coding?β he asks.
βBuilding and flipping websites mostly.β
βSweet.β
I shrug. βEh. It pays the bills. Pretty boring actually.β
βYou said mostly. What else do you do with it?β
βYouβre going to laugh.β
βYou donβt know that.β
βMost people do. They think itβs silly.β
βWhy?β
βBecause Iβm supposed to be some sophisticated professional black woman. Andβ¦ people think itβs silly or that I have no clue what Iβm talking about.β
βBut you do it anyway?β
βOn the down lowβ¦ ish. Most of my friends know.β
βOkay. Now you have to tell me.β
I sigh and say, βIβm a gamer. I like to reverse engineer them and explore the metadata and understand what makes them tick so I can demolish people in gameplay later.β
βWhatβs your favorite video game?β he asks as a grin spreads across his face.
βYouβre going to think itβs clichΓ©.β
βIβm not.β
βPokΓ©mon.β
βReally?β
βYes. Really.β
βI guess I can see why you donβt broadcast that. But I think thatβs neat, sweetheart.β
Iβd correct him for calling me sweetheart because usually when guys use it on me and they donβt know me itβs because theyβre being condescending or patronizing and not taking me seriously. But I can tell thatβs not how he means it.
βYou really think so?β
βHeck yeah. Thereβs a whole bunch of white guys on Youtube making videos and making a living doing that stuff. Itβs awesome that youβre a geek. You could make a Youtube channel actually. Call itβ¦ Call it βblack girl plays PokΓ©mon.β Or maybe not. I think thereβs an old gamer girl with that name because my friend practically worships her.β
I shrug. βItβs just a hobby. Something for fun. Nothing serious.β
βItβs cool though. PokΓ©monβs dope. Gaming is dope, period.β
We fall into a comfortable silence after that while everyone dances and Mariah makes rounds and thanks people as she collects cards in a yellow gift bag. No one bothers either of us for the rest of the night. He draws and I just watch him draw until, finally, the DJ announces heβs going to play one more song and that βnobody has to go home but you gotta get the hell up outta here.β
I hear my name from the front where the rest of the bridal party is coming together to gather the wedding gifts.
I sigh.
βMaid of honor duties?β he asks sympathetically.
βMaid of honor duties,β I say dryly. βGod I canβt wait until I get home. And then Iβm going to sleep and not answer my phone.β
βLucky you. Iβm responsible for gathering all these tuxes and returning them to the rental shop.β He groans.
I wince and say, βYeahβ¦ you definitely win for who has it worse. Good luck with getting those tuxedoes back intact.β
βIβm going to need it,β he says like heβs dreading it but heβs smiling.
My heart rate picks up, and I feel a distinct ache between my legs. I donβt think heβs my type personality wise, but heβs handsome and charming in a bit of an awkward yet appealing way. If I were younger, this would be the part where I would give him my address for later tonight. I bet heβs good in bed, if not a little timid. Those types are always fun. At least they used to be.
When I was ten years younger and had all the time in the world to settle down and find someone, one-night-stands were awesome and freeing and satiated my need for instant sexual gratification because I wanted nothing else. But now, those kinds of encounters have gotten old and giving into sexual hunger usually only leaves me wanting for something that will last a lot longer than the orgasm. Something much less tangible and quantifiable.
βSpring!β
Shanaβs urging behind me prevents me from making a decision I might regret as I grab my purse and take off before either one of us can say anything to each other. And by the time weβve taken all the gifts away, some to the brideβs motherβs car and some up to the suite the bride and groom have for the night, the guy with the sketch pad is long gone from the table in the back corner.
















